Reflection, story practice and transformation

In my last blog post I talked about how important it is to be reflective. I didn't go into why it is important - that is part of a much larger dissertation that forms the Transformative Narrative Project.

In story practice, reflection comes to life through expression. My argument is that through this expression comes transformation. Or is it more that reflection, expression and transformation are all necessary components of meaningful change, as well as a meaningful narrative about that change?

Reflection, it could be argued, is the core element in story practice. Through reflection we can notice those 'punctuation points' in our lives that lead to change, we can notice where the changes have manifested themselves and where they have led us. To exemplify: if a man changes jobs several times in his life, moving from one to the next without much thought, and in each role does the work he does without much effort, chances are he will not have felt the need to reflect too often. Imagine he comes home each day to a loving family, food on the table, clean sheets on the bed and his favourite shows on the TV - life would seem pretty good, wouldn't it? Besides the fact that this is a stereotype and few people will ever have this fairytale-inspired existence, reflection may be a redundant activity. But who really wants this life, even if they can have it?

Chances are this man, if he does exist, will end up knocking on my door at 40-something saying he feels unfulfilled and can't work out why. He may, by that time, be in the midst of career crisis, possibly with an anxiety-related illness.

Now imagine if you can that same man, reflecting on his life, what he had done well, what he had not done so well. What if he allowed himself to examine his hopes and dreams, taken some steps towards them, even failing in the process? Imagine that man putting himself into some risky situations to test his level of skill or endurance - what would he be doing differently by age 40-something do you think?

Story practice is about seeing your life as a narrative, a personal story that contains good bits and bad bits, times of success and times of failure, of health and of sickness, or good and bad relationships. It is more than just the detail; it is your interpretation of the detail that is important. More than that, it is your expression of this interpretation that makes it real. Once you have made it real, 'on the page', on show some way or another, you can transform your story and your life.